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Clown / Thursday, 22 January 2009



I don't know why I kept thinking about things that shouldn't be at the back of my mind. Despite saying I'm fine, deep down inside me, I am still very frustrated/miserable. Take my grandmother's death for example, eventhough its already almost 8 months since her passing, I am still not over the fact that she've gone forever. I am deeply hurt. I can even cry when watching cartoons which have the element of old, sick grandmother. I can even cry when I saw a someone who looks so much like her.

I hate looking back at the memories that we've shared. It's all so fond. But what happened now? It cut me deep like how the thorns on those cactus would hurt when I found out what happened. I am really disappointed. I don't think there's any words that can express what I'm feeling now. What I'm doing now is similar to that of a clown. No joke.
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Murnie ! Murnie. Neither 12 nor 14. But turning 18 by the end of the year. Attached and currently pursuing a diploma in RP. ;)

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